I Need To See The Cross

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MOMentum is a feature on my blog that attempts to connect the power of the gospel to the mom experience.

“I need to see the cross!” was the emphatic statement of my two-and-a-half year old son, Caleb. No, he wasn’t some sort of theological savant. He had a morbid obsession with the cartoon picture of Jesus dying on the cross in his Bible story book.  He wanted me to find that picture for him.

Caleb does need to see the cross. He needs to see it as something done for him. He needs to see it as something done by him. All of my kids need to see this. And I need to see this as well.

I have a tendency to want to race past the cross on my way to the throne of grace. I can zoom my kids past the cross as well when I’m walking them through correction. We identify the sin, pray for forgiveness, and ask for grace to change. We even include a “thank you for dying on the cross for my sins” part to our prayer. But still, I can neglect directing their attention to the cost of such lavish grace in their lives. I want to think of ways to show them the cross, not just in the moment of correction, but outside of those moments.

Is this morbid like Caleb’s toddler infatuation with a picture in his storybook? I don’t think so.  I think seeing the cross will keep us from taking our sins lightly because we see what our sin deserves at the cross. I think seeing the cross will help protect us from blaming others for our sins because at the cross Jesus took our blame.  I think seeing the cross will protect us from condemnation as we see our guilt and shame being completely taken by Jesus on the cross. I think seeing the cross will keep us humble as we see the sinless, holy One hanging there in our place. I think seeing the cross will reveal the love of God for us, and in turn we will love Him more.

I long for the day when my children will say on their own, “I need to see the cross.” Until that day comes, and even after, I want to lead them to the throne of grace, but on our way, stop and consider the means by which we enjoy such lavish forgiveness and grace: the cross of Jesus Christ.

Now we see Jesus brought before the priests and rulers, who pronounce him guilty; God himself imputes our sins to him, “the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all;” “He was made sin for us;” and, as the substitute for our guilt, bearing our sin upon his shoulders, represented by the cross; we see the great Scapegoat led away by the appointed officers of justice. Beloved, can you feel assured that he carried your sin? As you look at the cross upon his shoulders, does it represent your sin? There is one way by which you can tell whether he carried your sin or not. Have you laid your hand upon his head, confessed your sin, and trusted in him? Then your sin lies not on you; it has all been transferred by blessed imputation to Christ, and he bears it on his shoulder as a load heavier than the cross.

“Let not the picture vanish till you have rejoiced in your own deliverance, and adored the loving Redeemer upon whom your iniquities were laid.”
(Charles Spurgeon)

MOMentum: The Scandal of it All

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My dear friend, Briana, wrote this post on her blog, Pleasant Places. I think it is such an encouragement to moms in all seasons so I got her permission to post it for this week’s MOMentum.

Seems my sweet angel, Bella, has a devilish side to her. Don’t we all? Yep. It’s called the sin nature and we’re born with it no matter how amazingly cute, beautiful or innocent babies look.

Last week in church, our number was flashed at the front of the church to indicate that we needed to attend to one of our children’s needs. It’s usually for a diaper change or to take one of the boys to the bathroom. Nope. Not this time. This time, it was because my sweet baby threw another little girl out of her chair and tried to steal her pacifier. Nice. Sovereignly, my husband was the one who responded to the call. When he got back to our seat and told me what had happened, I actually started to cry.

I had such a long, hard week of discipline with my little girl, and I was discouraged by this report. I was also embarrassed to say the least. In moments like this, which happen a lot in my world, I want to look around at all the people witnessing my children’s bad behavior and reassure them that, yes, I do discipline them at home. Consistently. No. Faithfully. No. But, I do discipline them. I promise. I know it doesn’t look like it. But, I do…really. I do.

My ever discerning and gospel-centered husband quickly and rightly concluded what was going on in my heart at the moment and wrote a little note to me on the bulletin. It read something like this, “The scandal is not that our little girl is a sinner. The scandal is that God loved her enough to send His perfect son, Jesus, to shed His blood for her sins.”

I was so helped in that moment. I was set straight in such a gracious, God-glorifying way. My heart’s response to my husband’s little note was, “YES! It’s true. It is scandalous that the Perfect Creator of the Universe would condescend in such a way to love us and save us from our sins and from eternal death!”

So, today, when my daughter, unprovoked, smacked some boy in the library and made him cry, I was able to not be so surprised or embarrassed by her behavior but instead remember that I know God, her Savior, and have been given the amazing privilege of leading her to this Savior in these moments. I pray that one day, she will convincingly recognize not only her need for a Savior but also the Savior Himself, Jesus Christ who came to seek and save sinners just like her.

MOMentum: One Day When I Get My Act Together…

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I find myself living in the, “someday, when I get my act together I’ll…” mode often. It consists of this little fantasy world with visions of me doing all kinds of stuff that the real me just can’t seem to do. I find it frustrating to not know what the magical catapult to hurl me from here to there is. I was sharing this frustration with my husband who gave me some very wise counsel that I want to pass on. He said something like, “we often want the big grand moment when permanent change will take place and we will have our acts together, but our pride could never handle that. So God gives victory in the little things instead, but we are too often looking for some huge change and don’t notice the grace in ‘little’ victories.” He went on to tell me about something he saw on Antiques Roadshow (we love this show, me for the antiques; Jason for the history as well as the rush from seeing someone’s yard sale bargain turn into a retirement fund). A woman’s mother died leaving her a travel trailer and its contents. The contents included a small, simple painting of a sailboat race. When the appraiser informed the woman that its value was over $100,000 the woman just started crying and said, “if only my poor mother knew what she had…”

It wasn’t a Rembrandt or a Van Gogh. Indeed, we don’t even know the author’s name, and certainly had never seen this piece of art before. But it had far more value than the owner realized. This is what our lives are like. There will rarely be “Van Gogh art” moments when we finally have our acts together. If we go through the day looking for Van Gogh, and don’t see the simple work of art hanging in the trailer, we are poorer for it.

Father, please help me to see the amazing grace at work in my life and in the lives of those around me each and every day. This grace comes because of the Gospel. Help me not to be ungrateful for the small steps in the right direction, or arrogantly assume they are just me doing what is expected, rather than the Holy Spirit at work in and through me, again, because of the Gospel. Help me to have eyes to see Your artwork in the everyday events of my life, to the praise and glory of Your grace given through the Gospel.

*Edited version of a post from 2006

Because It Doesn’t Look Like Poetry

Yesterday I posted a little poem about the truly sacred place where many moms discipline their kiddies, the bathroom. Truth is, disciplining a child doesn’t usually look so “poetic”.  At least not in my house, which is why I didn’t use the first person in my poem.

The poem was actually inspired by a difficult week that included more discipline than usual. I was growing weary. I was growing weary in my battles with my own heart to just want to manipulate their behavior, or to judge them self-righteously, to grow impatient, to give in to anger. I was growing weary with their resistance to correction, their repeated infractions after corrections, their trying to manipulate me. Poetry? no. not at all.

But at one point when one of my twins was doing what we do (sometimes this is hard fought for on both our parts), hug while he prays in repentance, the Holy Spirit helped open my eyes to the beauty of the moment. This boy is getting so big. I won’t be so intimately involved with his process of repentance. I will one day really miss the somewhat robotic, but childlike faith-filled prayers he prays with his arms around my neck. I marveled, for a moment, at the privilege I have every day to bring my little ones – who aren’t so little anymore – to the throne of grace. And it just struck me as funny that this process also happens on a “throne” in the bathroom.

MOMentum: A Sacred Place

This is dedicated to mommies everywhere who perhaps spend time everyday  in some sacred place in their homes bringing correction to a little soul in their care and thereby showing forth the beauty of the gospel.

A  Sacred Place

The bathroom is her room of choice

To correct a wayward  girl or boy

She  takes them to that sacred place

And sees a little hardened face

Soften as she prays the prayer

She’s  prayed in variations there:

Have mercy on us  sinners here

Help us to see our sins more clear

Then help us turn to look and see

Our Savior on Mt. Calvary

And from a throne more commonplace

She leads them to the throne of Grace

MOMentum: Tools of Restoration

From Paul Tripp’s outstanding book, Whiter Than Snow:

You know whether a house is being restored or condemned by the size of the tools that are out front. If you see a crane and a wrecking ball, the house isn’t being restored; it’s coming down…

…So, in His grace God hammers at you, not with the sledgehammers of condemnation but with the small hammers of restoration. He’s constantly tapping the wedges of redemption into place. He’s constantly working to separate you and me from our sin. He’s refinishing us by His grace so that we can shine with His character. We’re forever free from the fear of the wrecking balls of condemnation. He was willing to be condemned so that we may live in beauty and for the purpose for which we were first constructed, the praise of His glory. (pg. 76 and 77 from reading #25 on Psalm 51:12)

Motherhood exposes my need for restoration. Each day I am confronted with the reality of my sin, the weakness of my character, and the need for wisdom and strength that are beyond me. In a word, motherhood is humbling. God is relentless in his removal of the triple-crown moldings of self-sufficiency, selfishness, and worry. But how comforting that He does so with such tenderness; such gentleness. My extraordinary experience day after day is:

Psalm 103:8 The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

Why is this my experience everyday? Because Jesus took the full, wrecking ball wrath my sins deserved. He suffered the brutality that should have been mine. When I consider God’s gentle restoration process in my life, I want to remember the means by which it comes: the agony of the cross of Jesus Christ. When I struggle under the discomfort of having my sin exposed and my heart worked on, may I run to the cross and consider what my fate should have been. May I run to the cross and see my sinless Savior there suffering in my place. May I run to the cross and be filled with fresh affection and wonder that my life has been purchased by Him and is everyday – often through the role of motherhood – being restored to show forth His glory.

MOMentum: An Ordinary Mother’s Gospel Opportunities

The handsomest guy to enter a pulpit (my husband, of course ) gave an excellent teaching (last year) on Philippians 1:12-18 entitled Advancing the Good News. It was the third teaching in the series on Philippians entitled: Good News For Real Life. To listen to it go here. Also, you can subscribe to the COG cast by clicking the red button on our website here.

Paul could see the gospel opportunity in everything. He was in a cell chained to a prison guard whose shift rotated every four hours. With each different guard came a new opportunity to share the gospel until Paul could say, the whole guard has heard… He was excited that many had become even more bold in the Lord to declare the gospel. He was even able to give thanks that people who were preaching the gospel for wrong motives were still being used by God to advance His purposes. Paul was captivated by one cause: the gospel of Jesus Christ and it affected how he viewed EVERYTHING.

So, what does that have to do with me, a full-time homemaker from Wadsworth, Ohio? My opportunities to preach the gospel seem few and far between. I can go days without even stepping outside of my home. But if I know that God’s mission is to see the glory of the gospel go forth, than I have to believe I am a part of this plan. Am I seeing the gospel opportunity in my life? I want to step back and let the gospel transform how I view things like:

picking up the hundredth cheerio off of the floor

dealing with toddler melt-down

teaching a less-than-enthusiastic fifth grader how to write a good topic sentence

greeting my husband with warmth and love not the attitude of a tag-team wrestler

bringing correction for the many fights and arguments that take place in our home

sleepless nights

sick kids

mountains of laundry

aching back

These things that can often feel like inconveniences, interruptions, delays, even obstacles are actually God-ordained gospel opportunities. So often I just move through my life not considering the fact that the gospel truly is the most important thing.

Not peace and quiet.

Not order.

Not obedient children.

Not good sleep or pain free living.

God has orchestrated all of these seemingly mundane aspects of life in a way that would provide the best opportunities for the gospel to go forth in and through my life. A gospel perspective means that when a normally selfish mom picks up her hundredth cheerio joyfully, without complaining, the effect of the gospel is on brilliant display. It means that when my toddler is melting down, I see that this little sinner needs a Savior and this is an opportunity to sow the hope of the gospel into his or her heart. A gospel perspective means that I see my son’s lack of enthusiasm for school as an opportunity for him to experience how the gospel relates to real life. He can do all things…even write paragraphs…even work hard on things he dislikes…through Christ who strengthens him.

Even though my sphere of influence is small right now, I want to have eyes that see beyond my circumstances to how God is using them to advance His glorious gospel. How I need His help to have this perspective! My prayer is that I would be a wife, mother, woman who loves the gospel and views all of life as a mission to see it advanced both in demonstrating its transforming affects, and proclaiming it’s glorious truth…for now that means getting dinner on the table right after I correct my un-named child for not responding to my request to set the table. Sweet gospel opportunities!

*this post has been slightly modified from it’s original form posted in February, 2008.

Resources for the Reality of Mercy

Here is a meditation I found by Charles Spurgeon from Morning and Evening, August 17th.

“The mercy of God.”
–Psalm 52:8

Meditate a little on this mercy of the Lord. It is tender mercy. With gentle, loving touch, He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. He is as gracious in the manner of His mercy as in the matter of it. It is great mercy. There is nothing little in God; His mercy is like Himself–it is infinite. You cannot measure it. His mercy is so great that it forgives great sins to great sinners, after great lengths of time, and then gives great favours and great privileges, and raises us up to great enjoyments in the great heaven of the great God.

It is undeserved mercy, as indeed all true mercy must be, for deserved mercy is only a misnomer for justice. There was no right on the sinner’s part to the kind consideration of the Most High; had the rebel been doomed at once to eternal fire he would have richly merited the doom, and if delivered from wrath, sovereign love alone has found a cause, for there was none in the sinner himself.

It is rich mercy. Some things are great, but have little efficacy in them, but this mercy is a cordial to your drooping spirits; a golden ointment to your bleeding wounds; a heavenly bandage to your broken bones; a royal chariot for your weary feet; a bosom of love for your trembling heart.

It is manifold mercy. As Bunyan says, “All the flowers in God’s garden are double.” There is no single mercy. You may think you have but one mercy, but you shall find it to be a whole cluster of mercies. It is abounding mercy. Millions have received it, yet far from its being exhausted; it is as fresh, as full, and as free as ever. It is unfailing mercy. It will never leave thee. If mercy be thy friend, mercy will be with thee in temptation to keep thee from yielding; with thee in trouble to prevent thee from sinking; with thee living to be the light and life of thy countenance; and with thee dying to be the joy of thy soul when earthly comfort is ebbing fast.

Also, I don’t know how much time I’ll have to recap. the conference I attended on Mercy. I’m still catching up on listening to the teachings from Thursday . But I encourage you to go to the website and download them. They are all available on MP3.

MOMentum:Back to Life; Back to Reality

MOMentum is a new feature of Ordinary Mother. My hope is to connect the impelling power of the gospel to ordinary motherhood.

Tomorrow is the first day of “real life” following a wonderful conference. Even though I came home late Saturday night, life has still been unusually easy. We spent Sunday with the Stewarts and Hendricksons eating fantastic food mostly provided by the Stewarts. The kids watched the game, sledded in the back yard, and played with their friends with narry an argument between them. Then today was Jason’s day off which gave me a fairly undistracted opportunity to catch up on laundry, and restock the pantry.

So I sit here tonight considering tomorrow, my first day back to reality for quite a while. I love my reality. I can’t imagine any other life for myself that could possibly be as rewarding as being a wife, mother, and homemaker. I’m not just saying that! I really am grateful for my life’s work in this season.

As much as I am grateful for my real life, it does require selfless serving, that I haven’t encountered for the past few days. I was thinking of a verse that might prepare my heart for tomorrow. I thought of Romans 12:1

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, [1] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.

Tomorrow I want to offer my body as a living sacrifice that is holy and acceptable to God, my spiritual act of worship. I marvel at the fact that what seems like mundane work around the house, or typical moments of mothering, or ordinary services for Jason can actually be received by God as worship! This is amazing, truly.

But it isn’t the most amazing thing about this verse. It isn’t what will keep me motivated all day long. What I hope to keep in view tomorrow is the most amazing phrase, “by the mercies of God”. Yes, I want to live sacrificially for the glory of God tomorrow. I long to have awareness of the sacredness of what I am doing for His glory. But I know that if I jump into my day with my sacrifice in view, I will ping pong between pride and condemnation as I have success and failure.

Tomorrow I want to keep His sacrifice in view with an eye toward the mercies that I receive as a result. Because Jesus Christ, the perfect Lamb of God, took the wrath my sins deserve when He suffered and died on the cross, now I receive mercy. Not just mercy but mercies. It could have been “by the judgment of God, offer yourselves” or “by the fear of God’s wrath, offer yourselves” but amazingly it is “by the mercies of God”. What a gracious God!

I pray that tomorrow, with all of what reality will look like, I will take time to consider God’s mercies to me and allow that to motivate my living sacrifice. I pray that I won’t just live conscious of the reality of motherhood, but conscious of the greater reality of mercy that is constantly flowing from the throne of grace, covering my sins and my attempts at righteousness.

That is my life.

That is my reality.

Resources for Patience

Jason lovingly handed me this book and asked me to read Chapter 7 entitled Patience. (hmmmm, I wonder why?! )It is the only chapter of this book I have read, but still I commend it to you if you want to grow in patience.

In the chapter on Patience, Jerry Bridges gives five aspects of patience.

1. suffering mistreatment

2. responding to provocation

3.tolerating shortcomings

4. waiting on God

5. persevering through adversity

I was very convicted by the aspects of responding to provocation and tolerating shortcomings -  mostly with regards to my children. Here is how Jerry Bridges describes provocation:

I use the word provocation to denote those actions of others that tend to arouse our anger or wrath – that cause us to lose our temper. Unlike mistreatment by others, which is often out of our control, provocation finds you in a position of power to do something about it…Whatever form the provocation takes, it is often deliberate, and we are in a position ot retaliate or punish swiftly and harshly.

Oh, how that gripped my heart when I first read it. How often do I retaliate to childish noises, inconveniences, and silliness with harsh retaliation or punishment. He continues to say, “The best way to develop this slowness to anger is to reflect frequently on the patience of God toward us.” He then illustrates with the parable of the unmerciful servant in Matthew 18.

With regard to tolerating shortcomings Bridges makes the direct connection to our pride. He reminds us of 1 Cor 4:7 and that “whatever abilities we possess have been given to us by God, so we have no reason to feel that we are any better than anyone else.” He also draws the distinct connection between love and forbearance.

He gives the greatest motivator for patiently forebearing:

God patiently bears with us, and every day, we are tempted to become impatient with our friends, neighbors, and loved ones. and our faults and failures before God are so much more serious than the petty actions of others that tend to irritate us! God calls us to graciously bear with the weaknesses of others, tolerating them and forgiving them even as He has forgiven us.

Patience is a virtue I desire to grow in, and Jerry Bridges’ helpful insights and connections to the gospel have proved a  means of grace to me.